Human Mating Strategies

Three red hearts aligned in chalk board game of tic-tac-toe

Humans have both long-term and short-term mating strategies that operate as concurrent functions sensitive to context and environmental conditions. For both men and women, a long-term mating strategy involves attracting and securing a mate to ensure sexual access and fidelity (for men especially), and the provision of resources and protection of children over time (for women especially.) As an evolutionary adaptation, men’s short-term mating strategy seeks more immediate sexual access to garner genetic fecundity. Women’s short-term mating strategy seeks to secure resources for short-term survival and paternal genetic quality.* (See summary table below for benefits and costs of strategies unique to men and women.)

Women’s long-term Strategy is Dominant
Women’s long-term mating strategy is a more predominant evolutionary adaptation than is their short-term strategy; it is driven by the genetic characteristics and interests of our species: internal fertilization, an extended period of gestation, prolonged infant dependence on mother’s milk, and the need for relatively “high” male parental investment (compared to other primates). Men’s short-term strategy is more predominant than their long-term strategy, but the difference is less pronounced behaviorally in modern times.

Mating Strategies are Dual Processing Switches
Long-term and short-term strategies for men and women are not binary operations but more like dual processing switches with a range or “volume” on each at any moment in time. They may function in parallel like a thermostat, modulating the influence of the other mode to keep a particular sexual personality in balance or at its “set” point.

Age, Fertilization Window and Trade-offs For women
Sexual strategies by men and women are influenced by age and especially a woman’s fertility window. When men have the greatest levels of testosterone (teens and twenties) and women have greatest fertility (late teens and twenties), there may be relatively more emphasis on physical attractiveness in both long and short-term strategies. As they age, men are more likely to emphasize long-term commitment – or a long-term strategy. A woman’s ratio of long and short-term strategy is more unpredictable as they age, with many factors of environment and context. Although much less predominant, a woman’s short-term mating strategy may include a complex set of motivations. (See Why Women Have Sex.) Furthermore, a woman’s long-term mating strategy often involves significant tension and trade-offs between her desire for a mate with resources and status, and her preference for loyalty, kindness, intelligence, and character traits for parenting. (See Double Binds Imposed on Men.)

Courtship Display and Mating Mechanisms
Human mating strategies include both courtship display mechanisms (attractors) and mating mechanisms. Evolutionary psychologists Glenn Geher, Geoffrey Miller, and other researchers call these mechanisms “mating intelligence” and see them as operating independently of one another, each predicting mating success.

 Assortative Mating: “In or Out of Your League”
Within these basic strategies is the tendency to pursue and be attracted to someone who is similar in age, socio-economic status, geographic location, educational attainment, physical characteristics, and facial attractiveness. This “assortative mating” phenomenon demonstrates the power of “mate value” attributions about self and others (being in, near, or “out of your league”), and assessments of “value” correlated specifically to what is desired in the opposite sex. (See Science of Attraction and Beauty.)

Serial Mating, Infidelity, and Consensual Non-monogamy
Humans also have “subset” mating strategies or mating behaviors that intersect with basic long and short-term strategies, including serial mating and extra-pair copulation (EPC) – i.e. infidelity or consensual non-monogamy. Which mating strategy is adopted very much depends on individual mate value. Those higher in mate value can more easily implement their preferred mating strategy. In general, higher mate value women focus even more on a long-term strategy, and higher mate value men may focus even more on a short-term strategy. Mating strategy can also be influenced by the sex ratio in the local mating pool and operation of social/cultural norms in the local environment.

Ultimately, what people want in a long-term mate can be quite different from what they want in a short-term mate. Humans employ “strategic pluralism” — a variety of strategies and tactics when it comes to mating. There are multiple routes to mating success. **

*See blog: Mate Switching Hypothesis

**Buss. D. M. & Schmitt, D.P. (1993)  Sexual strategies theory: An evolutionary perspective on human mating. Psychological Review, 100, 204-232.

**Gangestad, S.W. & Simpson, J.A. (2000). The evolution of human mating: Tradeoffs and strategic pluralism. Behavioral and Brain Sciences, 23, 573-587.

 

Women’s Mating Strategies – Benefits and Costs

Long-Term Strategy

Benefits Costs
  • Significant resources from mate
  • Parental investment
  • Restricted sexual opportunity*
  • Sexual obligation to mate*

These benefits have pre-eminent value in female mate selection and thus overall power to influence sexual access and male behavior.

* Subject to contemporary non-monogamous agreements 

Short-Term Strategy

  • Some resources from mate
  • Good genes from mate (subject to new research)
  • Risk of sexually transmitted disease
  • Risk of pregnancy
  • Reduced value as a long-term mate

These costs have significant influence on female sexual response and sexual psychology.

 

Men’s Mating Strategies – Benefits and Costs

Long-Term Strategy

Benefits Costs
  • Increased paternity certainty
  • Improved social competitiveness of children
  • Sexual and social companionship, especially for “beta” males
  • Restricted sexual opportunity*
  • Heavy parental investment
  • Heavy relationship investment

These benefits, when favored by adaptive evolution, influence all domains of male behavior, especially sexual initiation and intra-sexual competition. 

* Subject to contemporary non-monogamous agreements

Short-Term Strategy

  • Potential to reproduce, more sexual partners
  • No parental investment
  • Risk of sexually transmitted disease
  • Some resource investment

These benefits, shaping evolution of male neurology and physiology, influence male behavior, especially sexual initiation and intra-sexual competition.